三年级英语笑话爆笑

时间:2020-08-26 18:15:03 英语笑话 我要投稿

三年级英语笑话大全爆笑

  幽默的人不仅仅会说笑话,还要懂得他人说的笑话,来测试一下你的幽默细胞的指数有多高吧!

三年级英语笑话大全爆笑

  三年级英语笑话大全爆笑一:篮球教练的心理学测试

  The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oraltest.

  一位刚刚做完一场有关心理健康讲座的心理学指导老师,正在进行一个口头测试。

  Speaking specifically about manic depression, she asked, "How would you diagnose a patientwho walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chairweeping uncontrollably the next?"

  测试主题定为躁狂抑郁症,她问道:“你将怎样诊断这样的一个病人,他先是来回走着并大声叫喊了一分钟,然后坐在一张椅子上失控般地哭泣。”

  A young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"

  一个坐在后面的年轻人举手答道:“他是一个篮球教练?”

  三年级英语笑话大全爆笑二:爱尔兰人的运气

  Two Irish lovers are sitting on a bench, in a park. They are holding hands,but the lady is nervously twisting her hands.

  一对爱尔兰情侣坐在公园里的长椅上。他们手牵着手,但是那个女的一直紧张地摆弄她的双手。

  Mary: “Patrick. I have something to tell you.”

  玛丽:“帕特瑞克,我有些事想告诉你。”

  Patrick: “Well,what’s on your mind? You know you can tell me everything.”

  帕特瑞克:“好的,你在想什么?有什么事你尽管可以跟我说。”

  Mary: “It’ s so terrible.”

  玛丽:“这件事简直太难讲出口了。”

  Patrick: “You know you can trust me. What is it?”

  帕克瑞克:“请你相信我,到底是什么事?”

  Mary: “Well, it was a few years ago. Father lost his job, and no money in sight…”

  玛丽:“那是好几年前的事了。我爸爸失业了,当时没有钱。”

  Patrick: “So, what is it?”

  帕特瑞克:“那然后呢?”

  Mary: “Oh. We were so desperate. For some time I had to turn… prostitute!”

  玛丽:“哦,当时我们简直是绝望之极。所以有时候我不得不去做妓女!”

  Patrick: “WHAT!”

  帕特瑞克:“你说什么?”

  Mary: “We needed the money so bad!”

  玛丽:“我们太需要钱了。”

  Patrick: “There is no good reason for this! Endangering your very soul! How could you? YOU! Mary, this is more than I can stand!”

  帕特瑞克:“不要找借口开脱了。出卖你的灵魂,你怎么能这么做呢? 你! 玛丽,这我实在是接受不了。”

  Mary: “Not you, Pat! No! I thought you'd understand. I thought your could still love me, even though I had been a whore.”

  玛丽:“不,帕特请不要这样,我觉得你能理解我。我相信你依然爱我,哪怕我曾经出卖过自己的身体。”

  Patrick:“Oh! … You … Well, that's ok. For a moment I thought you said protestant’!”

  帕特瑞克:“哦,你等会儿,那没关系。刚才我还以为你是说你是当了新教徒呢。”

  三年级英语笑话大全爆笑三:又一个引擎出了故障

  A Boeing 747 was flying in the night sky of the Pacific Ocean. The captain got on the loud speaker:" Travellers, one of our engines was out of order , therefore we’ll arrive in Tokyo an hour late ."

  一架波音747飞行在太平洋的夜空,喇叭里传来机长的声音:“旅客们,我们的一个引擎坏了,因此我们将晚到达东京一个小时。”

  After a short while, the trumpet rang out again:" Everybody, the second one of our four engines went wrong, we will reach Tokyo late three hours as a result." At this time, the passengers started disturbance.

  过了一会儿,喇叭再次响起:“诸位,我们四个引擎中又坏了一个引擎,为此我们将晚到三个小时。”这时,乘客开始骚动。

  Someone said:" In case another engine is down again , we’ll be up here all night." Moreover, a chap got to shouting unendurably:" I do not choose to take your awful airplane any longer, let me get off quickly."

  有人说:“万一再坏一个,我们得呆在天上一整夜了。”还有已经受不了的,大叫:“我再也不坐你们的'破飞机了,快让我下去。”

  三年级英语笑话大全爆笑四:Problem with gas放屁的问题

  A little old lady goes to the doctor ... and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't really bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent." The doctor says, "I see. Here's a prescription. Take these pills 3 times a day for seven days and come back to see me next week." The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts ... although still silent... stink terribly." The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's start working on your hearing."

  有位小老太太去看医生:“医生,我有爱放屁的毛病。其实也不是大问题,只是我放屁不臭而且没声音。事实上,我在这里已经放了20多个屁,但是你并不知道对吧,因为我的屁不臭,而且还没声音。”医生说:“好的,我明白了。吃这个药片,一天三次连续吃七天,下星期你再来。”一星期后老太太来了,“医生,你到底给的我什么药,现在我放屁还是没声音,但是怎么这么臭!”医生说:“太好了!你的嗅觉正常了,现在开始治听觉。”



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