爆笑英语笑话带汉语

时间：2020-08-26 18:15:10 英语笑话我要投稿

爆笑英语笑话大全带汉语

　　幽默的人不仅仅会说笑话，还要懂得他人说的笑话，来测试一下你的幽默细胞的指数有多高吧!

爆笑英语笑话大全带汉语

　　爆笑英语笑话大全带汉语一：电子邮件

　　A man left for a vacation to Jamaica.

　　有个人去牙买加度假，

　　His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day.

　　他的妻子正好出差，所以打算在他到之后的第二天去找他。

　　When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail message.

　　他到了宾馆，想要给妻子发封邮件，

　　Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory.

　　但是记着邮箱的纸找不到了，于是他凭着记忆把信发到了一个邮箱。

　　Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife whose husband had passed away only the day before.

　　很不幸，他漏掉了一个字母，因此他的信发到了一个老传教士的妻子的邮箱里，而传教士恰好在前一天去世了。

　　When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead.

　　悲痛的老妇人察看邮箱，看着显示器屏幕她尖叫一声，随后就倒在地上死去了。

　　At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: "Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

　　听到她的声音，家人赶忙跑进她的房间，只见这样一句话显示在屏幕上：“亲爱的，快来吧。为了你明天的到来，一切都准备好了。爱你的丈夫。

　　Your Loving Husband. P.S. Sure is hot down here."

　　顺便说一句，这里可真够热的'。”

　　爆笑英语笑话大全带汉语二：Beautiful Hat 漂亮的帽子

　　Mr Jones had a few day's holiday, so he said, "I am going to go to the mountains by train."

　　He put on his best clothes, took a small bag, went to the station and got into the train. He had beautiful hat, and he often put his head out of the window during the trip and looked at the mountains. But the wind pulled his hat off.

　　Mr Jones quickly took his old bag and threw that out of the window too. The other people in thecarriage laughed. "Is your bag going to bring your beautiful hat back?" they asked.

　　"No," Mr Jones answered, "but there's no name and no address in my hat, and there's name and an address on the bag. Someone's going to find both of them near each other, and he's going to send me the bag and the hat."

　　琼斯先生有几天假期，于是他说：“我要乘火车山区度假。”

　　他穿上最好的衣服，拿了一个手提包，到了火车站上了车。他戴了一顶漂亮的帽子。在旅途中不时地把头伸向车窗外观看山中的风景，结果他的帽子被风吹跑了。

　　琼斯先生立即拿起自己的拎包，把它也扔到了窗外。车厢里的乘客都笑了，他们问琼斯先生：“难道拎包会把你漂亮的帽子找回来吗?”

　　“不会。”琼斯先生说，“但是，我的帽子上面没有姓名也没有地址，可我的包上却又有姓名又有地址。有人会在不远的地方发现这两样东西，然后他会把帽子连同帽子一起寄给我的。”

　　爆笑英语笑话大全带汉语三：酒后驾车

　　Late one night a police officer was patrolling a rowdy bar to anticipate possible DUI violations.

　　一天深夜，一名警察去一个经常有人闹事的酒吧门口巡逻，为了避免有酒后驾车的情况发生。

　　At closing time, he saw a fellow tumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys in five different cars before he found his.

　　酒吧打烊了，他看见一个家伙跌跌撞撞的跑出来，一下摔在路边，随后又用钥匙试着开了五辆车的门才找到他自己的车。

　　Then he sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes.

　　坐进车里，好几分钟他又都是在摸着那些钥匙。

　　Everyone else left the bar and drove off. Finally he started his engine and began to pull away.

　　这时人们都从酒吧出来并且开车走了。最后他也发动了车子准备开走，

　　The police officer was waiting for him and turned on his light and pulled the driver over, read him his rights and administered the breathalyzer test.

　　警察已经等这个机会很久了，他打开灯，把司机从车里拉出来，给他宣读了他所享有的法定权利，然后作了酒精的测试。

　　The test results showed a reading of 0.00.

　　测试的结果是零，

　　The puzzled officer demanded to know how could that be.

　　于是困惑的警察问他是为什么，

　　The driver replied, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy!"

　　司机说：“今晚他们派我当诱饵。”

　　爆笑英语笑话大全带汉语四：How much English can you speak?

　　"Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to be accused of theft. He arrived in New York City a week ago and barely knew his way around. What's more, he only speaks a few words of English."

　　The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?"

　　The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!"

　　"法官先生，我的当事人被指控偷窃，这是多么不公正啊。他一周前才来到纽约，几乎不认路。而且，他只会说几个英语单词。"

　　法官看了看被告，问道："你会说多少英文?"

　　被告抬起头，说："把你的钱包给我!"

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