爆笑简短英语笑话

时间：2020-10-21 16:42:30 英语笑话我要投稿

爆笑简短英语笑话

　　一个人的聪明才智会在幽默的谈吐中闪光，并且会深深吸引他人。下面，小编给大家收集整理了爆笑简短英语笑话，增加幽默细胞，聪明的`你一定会成为闪光点。

爆笑简短英语笑话

　　爆笑简短英语笑话篇一：I thought I had gone deaf 我还以为我聋了

　　On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"

　　To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"

　　在一个乡村路上，一警察让这个农民靠边停车，说：“先生，你意识到你的妻子在几公里前从车上掉下去了吗?”

　　农民回答说：“感谢上帝，我还以为我聋了呢!”

　　爆笑简短英语笑话篇二：Good Points and Bad Points 优缺点

　　"This house," said the real-estate salesman, "has both its good points and bad points. To show you I'm honest, I'm goint to tell you about the disadvantage - there is a chemical plant one block south and a slaughterhouse one block north."

　　"What are the advantages?" inquired the prospective buyer.

　　"The good thing about it," said the agent, "is that you can always tell which way the wind is blowing."

　　“这幢房子，”房地产推销商说，“既有优点也有缺点。为了说明我是诚实的，我将告诉你们它的缺点：往南面一个街区是一家化工厂，往北面一个街区是一家屠宰场。”

　　“那么它的长处呢?”预备购买房子的人问道。

　　“它的好处，”代理商说道，“就是，你总能分清风是从哪边吹过来的。”

　　爆笑简短英语笑话篇三：Calming your son 让你儿子静下来

　　In the supermarket was a man pushing a cart which contained a screaming, bellowing(吼叫)baby. The gentleman kept repeating softly, "Don't get excited, Albert; don't scream, Albert; don't yell, Albert; keep calm, Albert."

　　A woman standing next to him said, "You certainly are to be commended(称赞，表扬) for trying to soothe(安慰) your son, Albert."

　　The man looked at her and said, "Lady, I'm Albert."

　　一个人在超市里推着购物车，一个小孩子在车里不停的大吵大叫。推车的男人一直温柔地念叨着：”别激动，阿尔伯特，别嚷出来，阿尔伯特，别叫，阿尔伯特，冷静，阿尔伯特。"

　　站在他旁边的一位女士对他说道：“您能这样安慰您的儿子阿尔伯特真的让我们感到很不容易。”

　　男人看着那位女士说：“太太，我是阿尔伯特。

　　爆笑简短英语笑话篇四：Secret For a Long Life 长寿秘诀

　　A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch(门廊) .

　　I couldn't help noticing how happy you look, she says. What's your secret for a long, happy life?

　　I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never,ever exercise.

　　Wow, that's amazing, says the woman. How old are you?

　　Twenty-six.

　　一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头。

　　我无意中发现，你是多么幸福，那女士说。你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么?

　　我每天抽三包烟，每周喝一箱威士忌，吃高脂肪食品，而且从来不曾锻炼。

　　哦，真神奇，女士说。你高寿?

　　二十六。

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