Mother: Why did you get such a low mark on that test?
Kid: Because of absence.
Mother: You mean you were absent on the day of the test?
Kid: No, but the kid who sits next to me was.
1.A Half-price Ticket
"How much is the movie ticket?"
"Ten dollars, kid."
"I only have five dollars. Please let me in. I'll see it only with one eye."
“All the kids make fun of me.” the boy cried to his mother.“They say I have a big head”
“Don't listen to them.”his mother comforted him.“You have a beautiful head . Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes”
“Where's the shopping bag?”
“I haven't got one,use your hat.
Little Robert asked his mather for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
Where is the father?
Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.
"Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"
"Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?"
The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures."